When I first started writing on this blog about my days when I was a dating personals junkie, I came off as a douche, (not as bad as a former writer on this site but needless to say, I upset quite a few readers nonetheless.)

A lot of women out there have had men in their lives that have made them go insane from confusion and I'm not afraid to say that I was one of those dudes.

Sometimes when a man dumps a woman, it honestly does come from out of nowhere.  Unfortunately when a woman says this, her girlfriends and male friends are always trained to think there were sure fire signs that they were going to be dumped.

When I recently asked Sabrina why she put up with my crap for so long, she said that she knew deep down that I cared for her even though I worked hard to prove the opposite.  She said her friends thought she was going nuts and was in constant denial and doomed to be chronically unsatisfied with her future relationships, but she said she knew in her heart that one day we would end up together.

This got me thinking about all the female readers and blog enthusiasts I have encountered in the past year who talked about their elusive exes to no end.  Most men would see these women as desperate and delusional and although some ARE, most aren't.

I'm here to admit that there are women out there that truly do everything right at the beginning of a budding relationship and they still get dumped.  They ration their phone calls and text messages to a minimum.  They wait a significant amount of time before having sex and then they wait for the guy to call them the next day.  They are fun and personable and yet some of these ladies still get broken up with.

A lot of guys would not like me to admit this, but almost every guy has dumped a woman they really liked at some point in their lives and although I can't speak for all men, I will definitely reveal a few reasons as to why men suddenly show a disinterest in women they could possibly build a future with.

We're Not Established Or Financially Secure

When you were a teenager, dating was so uncomplicated even though you probably made it into a huge big deal it wasn't.  Although, when you grow up there are certain expectations of a partner-especially a male partner.  Before the only thing we had to worry about was 'Attraction.'  However, when a man starts dating a woman while he's been crashing on his mother's couch for the past six months, it will get to him.  We know that once we start dating a girl we like, we need to grow the hell up and dating someone we really like when we're not established or financially secure makes us feel far worse than they would if we were single.

We're Not Ready To Change Our Lives For You

So he bailed on you and you're wondering what you did to scare him away.  Unfortunately, sometimes the sad truth is 'nothing.' Sometimes the guy is just not in the right place in his life to think about building a future with a woman, when he can't even cope with building a future for himself.   Men and women are very different when it comes to finding "the one.”  When a woman meets the right man, she instantly gets serious.  Women feel more inclined to juggle their social lives, careers and family around the man they are dating.  Generally, men do not have the same multi-tasking skills.  We seem to get serious with women we're dating only when we're ready to settle down.  If the timing is off, then the man is more likely to bail.

We're Still Thinking With Our Other Head

To us fellas, the grass is always greener.  It doesn't matter how much we connect with the girl we are dating.  If we're not ready to settle, we're constantly thinking about the next woman we will be getting into bed.  Like Eddie Murphy had once so eloquently said in Raw, "It's a dick thing. Don't try to understand it.”  The older we get, we understand it's more of an ego thing and in most cases, it will die down.

We Exaggerate Your Flaws

No woman may wants to think that the guy they're seeing notices the flaws about themselves, but guess what?  We do.  If we're huge commitment-phobes, we will pay attention as to how quickly you eat, how stylish you dress or how many times you get "on top” and worry that things will be different in the future. I'm sorry to say this ladies but guys DO worry about you gaining too much weight and if you will stop looking pretty for them once you start getting comfortable.   Even if we're crazy about you,  we are so scared about you turning into our nagging chunky girls who never it up because that is what happened in our previous relationships.

You're Simply Not "The One”

Unfortunately, this is the main reason why guys dump girls they like. This may be a hard pill to swallow but just because a guy likes you a lot, it doesn't mean he will ever love you.   Women may know within five seconds if they want to sleep with a man, but men know within five minutes after waking up beside a woman they slept with if she's going to be the one for him in the long run.   A lot of men are all about living in the moment and it tends to hurt a lot of women when they bail.  If we know you are into us far more than we're into you, we will try to spare your feelings and get out quickly before you really get hurt--which unfortunately is not quick enough.

I know what you are thinking: We still sound like assh*les.  But these are universal reasons to break up with someone.  Women even feel like this in their relationship with guys they like but the thing is I find more (not all but more) women settle in relationships that are not right for them instead of being courageous and going for who and what they want in the long run.

If a guy dumped you and you're sure that he is still into you, let him go. If he's really the one, he will step up to the plate eventually.  If not, then forget him because the one who you should end up with is someone who will make it work and not run away when it's inconvenient-because as I recently found out, there is nothing convenient about loving someone.